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Chibi Ninja Blog

Life as an artist with Borderline Personality Disorder

Author: chibininjablog

I'm a passionate athlete and lover of words. I struggle with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and depression, but I'm determined to make something great of myself. Update: I started this blog in 2016, but as of April 2019, I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and may also be bipolar. I am still determined to do something great with my time here on Earth. My words are my connection to you, to myself, and to existence.
November 17, 2020

My Relationship With Codependency

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

I decided to write this blog to share my thoughts and observations on codependency and how it has affected my relationships and mental health. My Relationship With Codependency

November 17, 2020November 17, 2020

My Relationship With Codependency

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

I decided to write this blog to share my thoughts and observations on codependency and how it has affected my relationships and mental health.

November 18, 2019November 18, 2019

Poetry: Split

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Crashing smashing

Claws slashing

Teeth gnashing

Thrashing my heart,

The depth of my soul

Into the wall.

November 8, 2019

Poetry: First Kiss(es)?

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Trigger warning: This poem contains trauma content. I’m learning to not be afraid anymore.

November 5, 2019

My BPD: Splitting

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

Splitting is a defense mechanism often used by people who suffer from BPD or other trauma to turn a situation into a complete black or white situation to cope with pain or suffering.

November 5, 2019November 5, 2019

Love Poem: Coming Home to You

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Your fingers squeeze my organs

Like a baby’s loving grasp,

Reactive, Instinctive,

Holding with gentle trust. 

October 30, 2019October 30, 2019

Poetry: Love is a Greedy Bitch

Posted by chibininjablog in Poetry

Who is this ambiguous figure 

That contorts and lingers into 

Green, eyes pried to the side 

For intended hurt pride;

October 21, 2019October 21, 2019

Poetry: The Tragedy of First Love

Posted by chibininjablog in Poetry

Our feet were dirty with sand

as we danced 

hand in hand; we laughed 

like two kittens

bitten by euphoria,

an original story

of crush-smitten children. 

October 14, 2019

The Dichotomy of Sexuality and Self-Esteem

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

Sexuality is a complicated subject for me. I grew up very sheltered and innocent, so sex has long been associated with shame and fear in my mind. When I began to come of age, I interpreted my yearnings and urges to be a longing for love. I associated sensuality and affection for acts of love…Read more »

October 9, 2019October 8, 2019

Poetry: touch me; Please don’t

Posted by chibininjablog in Poetry

What is it to yearn?

I’ve learned that a touch, a caress

Can be the most painful of sensations.

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