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Chibi Ninja Blog

Life as an artist with Borderline Personality Disorder

Category: Personl Blog

November 17, 2020

My Relationship With Codependency

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

I decided to write this blog to share my thoughts and observations on codependency and how it has affected my relationships and mental health. My Relationship With Codependency

November 17, 2020November 17, 2020

My Relationship With Codependency

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

I decided to write this blog to share my thoughts and observations on codependency and how it has affected my relationships and mental health.

November 18, 2019November 18, 2019

Poetry: Split

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Crashing smashing

Claws slashing

Teeth gnashing

Thrashing my heart,

The depth of my soul

Into the wall.

November 8, 2019

Poetry: First Kiss(es)?

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Trigger warning: This poem contains trauma content. I’m learning to not be afraid anymore.

November 5, 2019

My BPD: Splitting

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

Splitting is a defense mechanism often used by people who suffer from BPD or other trauma to turn a situation into a complete black or white situation to cope with pain or suffering.

November 5, 2019November 5, 2019

Love Poem: Coming Home to You

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Your fingers squeeze my organs

Like a baby’s loving grasp,

Reactive, Instinctive,

Holding with gentle trust. 

October 14, 2019

The Dichotomy of Sexuality and Self-Esteem

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

Sexuality is a complicated subject for me. I grew up very sheltered and innocent, so sex has long been associated with shame and fear in my mind. When I began to come of age, I interpreted my yearnings and urges to be a longing for love. I associated sensuality and affection for acts of love…Read more »

October 9, 2019

Mental Illness Awareness Week: Dissociation

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog, Poetry

Dissociation is a Psychology term for a group of symptoms, usually caused by trauma, that include depersonalization, amnesia, feelings of numbness and disengagement.

September 30, 2019September 30, 2019

Poetry: please make them stop

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

please make them stop  They follow As I swallow gulps of hazy regrets Set in the unsettling of my stomach When my back gets wet and mouth dry In a heaving crying sigh of longing For relief. I want to keep the fantasy Alive, striving to sleep at night,  Unmoved by the black spirits That…Read more »

September 28, 2019September 28, 2019

Depression and BPD: Coping with Guilt

Posted by chibininjablog in Personl Blog

​ Guilt is a very intense emotion that I feel for almost every aspect of my life. I know that intense feelings of guilt and shame aren’t limited to people with BPD, but are common feelings for people with chronic depression as well. I’ve often heard people say “guilt and shame are good, they’re what…Read more »

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